HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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