Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
