Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
