you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
