He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
you inspire me to be a worse person
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
