I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
