There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
It's shark week go big or go home
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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