umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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