Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
