think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
