Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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