Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
there was a trapeze. enough said
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Randomize
