don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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