I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
My feet surprised me
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
