I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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