so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
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