so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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