Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
