Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
