we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
