Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
That's intense
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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