Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
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