do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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