but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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