brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
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