1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
