New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
