She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize