I'll bet she douches with gravy.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
