kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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