I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
