and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
