You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
