I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
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