Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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