Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize