Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
