We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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