so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
