Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
