Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
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