it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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