ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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