He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
