I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize