It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize