Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Randomize
