so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
