even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
