Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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