Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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